Category: Prairie Home Companion - Dan Fiorella: Writer @ large

Dan Fiorella

Barely Home Companion - The Hawaiian Rule (1/02)

1/5/2021

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

I've forgotten what an overhaul this sketch had gotten from my submission. The show was since on its road trip and was doing the show from Hawaii. I broke the cardinal rule of writing for PHC, doing TV references. And that little bit of the bit is simply a set up to the main part of the sketch, a SFX skit about coconuts, which I had totally forgotten about. So, Garrison actually took my premise that the FCC requires all broadcast shows to do episodes from Hawaii, and swapped out my TV references (Brady Bunch, Sanford and Son) with other dated TV references like Mr. Ed, Gomer Pyle, Ed Sullivan...and Arthur Godfrey.). Obviously, they turned it into a bit that showcased Tim Russell vocal talents. Some of my references (I Love Lucy, Elvis) got in but vastly reworked. I guess because of that, I got no on air or online credit for the bit. But the SFX half is a pretty good, silly premise with the usual type of SFX antics. Sorry that didn't make it in.

The full show ishere. I put the broadcast version of the sketch below.

The Hawaiian Rule

Barely Home Companion - Taliban 12/22/01

12/22/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Meanwhile, back at life in post 9/11...With the hunt on for Osama Bin Laden after the terrorist attacks, there were lots of reports of where he was alleged to be. And he kept releasing videos. And kept declaring one jihad after another, to keep his base energized. And that's where the idea for this sketch came from, that he's in the cave reduced to declaring jihads on every little annoyance. Seemed like a classic sketch premise.

Now what they did to it was use the premise, use the gags, reorder them, reword them and then have it wander off into some weird winter wonderland bit. And for that, the credit reads:

© Garrison Keillor 2001, additional material by Dan Fiorella

I often joked that Garrison Keillor was exactly the kind of guy the WGA was created to fight. As I've said before, GK was pretty random with credits and here is the strongest display of his randomness. It's obviously my work, tinkered with. I am hardly the "additional material," he is. Hey, yeah, it's been a long time, but if I just silently accept it, the terrorists win. But as some outsider, I was grateful to be reminded that they were still reading my submissions and seeing stuff good enough to use. And pay for. Here's my version of the skit followed by the broadcast version that PHC archived here.

Bin Laden, Done That

Barely Home Companion - Being North Dakota (Dec. 2001)

12/15/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Here's one of those times it sucks to be a stringer. They were doing another road show. So I did some research and one of the news items for North Dakota back in 2001 was an effort to re-name the state. That sounded like a solid premise for a sketch. So I wrote it up and submitted it. And they used it. Or rather, re-purposed it. A truncated version of the bit winds up in that week's Guy Noir adventure, as the premise to kick off his latest case. Just mentioning the idea of renaming the state got a huge laugh. After that, they just run through the gag names without much commitment and then they go off on a lot bit about a finished basement and accents. But, the check cleared, and I picked up shared credit on the skit:

© Garrison Keillor, Dan Fiorella 2001

So, here's the original skit and an edited recording the broadcast version of my material below. The link to the full bit on the PHC site is here.

Being North Dakota

Barely Home Companion - A Charlie Brown Mid-Life Christmas (12/01)

12/13/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

This was a strange run for me. They used some of my writing during the month of December, but never quite in the context I wrote it. I had this piece called A Charlie Brown Mid-Life Christmas which I adapted for radio and submitted. Granted, it faced the hurdle of being too TV, but, it's Peanuts, for heaven's sake and a classic Christmas special. Anyway, they lifted one line from my piece and used it in one of his Barry Minot sketches, a running bit he did that sounded like many of the other running bits he did. I got an "Additional material" credit for my efforts:

© Garrison Keillor 2001, additional material by Dan Fiorella

I posted my version of the sketch a couple of Christmases ago (the link is above) as a "Skit Happens" entry. The broadcast version is below, with the PHC page here. They saved my line for the big ending.

Barely Home Companion: What are ya, Stupid? (6/2001)

7/9/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Here's one of those bits I had forgotten about. The show's season was winding down and I was pretty much putting every pet peeve of mine into a sketch. It didn't get picked, and I can't argue the point. It's a weird, angry little bit...

What are ya, Stupid?

Barely Home Companion - Fathers Day (6/2001)

6/21/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

They were still traveling around the country, but it was Fathers Day weekend, so I went that route with the material I submitted. I would note that a lot of these things are taken from real life events, stuff I received and did, along with stuff my dad received and did. And I broke it up into 2 quick sketches. It was not something they did often, but it just seemed to work for these bits...nothing too long and dragged out, linked by topic, so it would flow naturally. But, they didn't get picked. So, for Fathers Day, I'd like to present:

DUCT TAPE FOR FATHER'S DAY

Barely Home Companion: House of Tea (6/2001)

6/11/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

The second bit I sent the week PHC was in Seattle was naturally going to take on coffee culture. This is actually a reoccurring theme in my body of work, store commercials for owners that are in over their heads. So a guy running a tea shop in Seattle seemed like a perfect bit, I know I've pulled it out and submitted it elsewhere, but it never got picked up. So now it's on my blog! That's something, right? Enjoy!

Dave's House of Tea

Barely Home Companion: The Old Story Teller: Seattle (6/2001)

6/9/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

PHC did its broadcast from Seattle that week, so I tried to come up with a couple of Seattle-themed skits, which is tricky, when my entire knowledge of Seattle was from coffee franchises, and the shows "Frasier" and "Here Come the Brides". First up was a sequel to the Old Story Teller bit I had written earlier that year. Again, it was a collection of facts I gathered online and simple silliness. But, it didn't make the cut. So the present:

The Old Story Teller: Seattle

Barely Home Companion: Roller Coasters (6/2001)

6/4/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

As summer was approaching, it was time to pull out summertime bits. I had written this piece as a prose article, then converted it into a Cracked magazine submission. It was accepted there, at least. I thought I did a fairly decent job at adapting it for radio, but I didn't make the cut. Perhaps it was a tad cruel and crude for GK, but I always fancied the idea of him reading certain expressions in that tone of his. Nevertheless, we now present the PHC version of...

Roller Coasters

Barely Home Companion: Land's End R&D (6/2001)

6/2/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Frankly, I don't remember much about this skit at all! I know Land's End was one of their regular sponsors but for the life of me, I don't remember what prompted me to write a sketch about the sponsors. Weird. Hey it was a long time ago and there was a lot of material churned out. My journals don't say much beyond things I sometimes submitted or was awaiting payment on, leading me to the conclusion that I'm a lousy journal keeper. Anyway, it was a no-go, so, here it is...

R & D

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