
It's back on the old PHC website (they had shrubbed it after GK had his #MeToo Moment a few years ago), but I'm posting my audio file below, so you may compare and contrast.
Dan Fiorella
Dan Fiorella: Writer @ large |
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From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
If memory serves, this is the last bit PHC bought from me. It's massively re-written as GK inserts his "tax & spend" liberal ideals into the bit to garder "clapter" (that's getting claps instead of laughter for something said. It's not a joke, just a declaration that everyone agrees with). It's just odd how I attempt to write a tight sketch, it gets unraveled into a meandering routine.
It's back on the old PHC website (they had shrubbed it after GK had his #MeToo Moment a few years ago), but I'm posting my audio file below, so you may compare and contrast. Post-State of the Union
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From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
Here's one of those submissions with a happy-ist ending. As I've mention before, I was always looking to write one of PHC's signature bits, not the big ones like the cowboys or the english major, but I tried his Guy Noir character (and got a line or two picked up for one sketch), I submitted for duct tape and ketchup to some success. But a many of my sketches had to pass through the GK-rewrite process.
One of my pet peeves is how we're inundated with Christmas music from Thanksgiving on and then somewhere around noon on Christmas Day, the radio station all go back to their standard playlists. I used the ketchup sketch to whine about that. But the folks latched onto the idea that music today sucks and people seem overly attached to 1950s pop music. It's weird how that's the premise they focused on. A version of my sketch was produced and there's a couple of my lines in their version. I got a check and an online credit. And enough confidence to continue submitting to the show for a couple of more years. I'm posting my version of the sketch, followed by the audio of the PHC Dec. 27, 2003 production (which they have in their archives, here Ketchup Advisory Board: Post-Holiday Blues![]()
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
This is actually a sketch tale and not a skit happens post, as this sketch made it in. I got a lot of nice feedback on this one. It's my homerun. Granted, they rearranged it a lot; GK is out and a regular announcer is in. The annoyed husband is now the wife.
Autumn Basket of Cheer![]() From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things... This was the second piece I submitted for their first week back in Feb. 2002. The Winter Olympics had been held, so it seemed like a perfect time to re-work and submit the winter version of the radio Olympics. The show often went off on nonsensical SFX adventures, just playing with the medium of radio, but I never got to a place where they would use one of my takes on it. I really tried to go beyond just a series of sound effects and give the bit some surreal basis to exist and then marry silly events to justify the various sound effects Tom Keith (the SFX guy) had in his repertoire. It's a fun, silly, quick-paced piece that didn't make the cut. Oh, well.. Radio Olympics![]() From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things... The show was back from it's winter break and broadcasting again in February 2002. And there were gearing up for an anniversary. It seemed like a decent premise to base a skit on. The show had done "alternate histories" of itself over the years, and I thought it fit along with the various "later tonight on your local public radio" commercial bits the show. I had forgotten about this sketch and it's just a remarkable goofy routine. It parodies radio, it parodies the Today Show, it parodies the Tomorrow Show (which was a pretty obscure target even back in 2002), it parodies Rush Limbaugh (which I often tried to slip in) and then it falls into one of my signature bits, where many people have the same name. I like to think of it as Pythonesque, because it's a ridiculous conceit, but I'm all in and follow it to a logical conclusion. But the show didn't think so. And it's really a bit that I felt couldn't be reworked for one of my other outlets back then. Now, maybe I could salvage it for the stage troupe. Which reminds me, I have a gameshow with all Jacks sitting on my hard drive that needs to be finished. Until then, I present: The John Romain Show![]()
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
I've forgotten what an overhaul this sketch had gotten from my submission. The show was since on its road trip and was doing the show from Hawaii. I broke the cardinal rule of writing for PHC, doing TV references. And that little bit of the bit is simply a set up to the main part of the sketch, a SFX skit about coconuts, which I had totally forgotten about. So, Garrison actually took my premise that the FCC requires all broadcast shows to do episodes from Hawaii, and swapped out my TV references (Brady Bunch, Sanford and Son) with other dated TV references like Mr. Ed, Gomer Pyle, Ed Sullivan...and Arthur Godfrey.). Obviously, they turned it into a bit that showcased Tim Russell vocal talents. Some of my references (I Love Lucy, Elvis) got in but vastly reworked. I guess because of that, I got no on air or online credit for the bit. But the SFX half is a pretty good, silly premise with the usual type of SFX antics. Sorry that didn't make it in.
The full show ishere. I put the broadcast version of the sketch below. The Hawaiian Rule![]()
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
Meanwhile, back at life in post 9/11...With the hunt on for Osama Bin Laden after the terrorist attacks, there were lots of reports of where he was alleged to be. And he kept releasing videos. And kept declaring one jihad after another, to keep his base energized. And that's where the idea for this sketch came from, that he's in the cave reduced to declaring jihads on every little annoyance. Seemed like a classic sketch premise.
Now what they did to it was use the premise, use the gags, reorder them, reword them and then have it wander off into some weird winter wonderland bit. And for that, the credit reads: © Garrison Keillor 2001, additional material by Dan Fiorella
I often joked that Garrison Keillor was exactly the kind of guy the WGA was created to fight. As I've said before, GK was pretty random with credits and here is the strongest display of his randomness. It's obviously my work, tinkered with. I am hardly the "additional material," he is. Hey, yeah, it's been a long time, but if I just silently accept it, the terrorists win. But as some outsider, I was grateful to be reminded that they were still reading my submissions and seeing stuff good enough to use. And pay for. Here's my version of the skit followed by the broadcast version that PHC archived here.
Bin Laden, Done That![]()
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
Here's one of those times it sucks to be a stringer. They were doing another road show. So I did some research and one of the news items for North Dakota back in 2001 was an effort to re-name the state. That sounded like a solid premise for a sketch. So I wrote it up and submitted it. And they used it. Or rather, re-purposed it. A truncated version of the bit winds up in that week's Guy Noir adventure, as the premise to kick off his latest case. Just mentioning the idea of renaming the state got a huge laugh. After that, they just run through the gag names without much commitment and then they go off on a lot bit about a finished basement and accents. But, the check cleared, and I picked up shared credit on the skit:
© Garrison Keillor, Dan Fiorella 2001
So, here's the original skit and what they broadcasted. The link to the full bit on the PHC site is here.
Being North Dakota![]()
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
This was a strange run for me. They used some of my writing during the month of December, but never quite in the context I wrote it. I had this piece called A Charlie Brown Mid-Life Christmas which I adapted for radio and submitted. Granted, it faced the hurdle of being too TV, but, it's Peanuts, for heaven's sake and a classic Christmas special. Anyway, they lifted one line from my piece and used it in one of his Barry Minot sketches, a running bit he did that sounded like many of the other running bits he did. I got an "Additional material" credit for my efforts:
© Garrison Keillor 2001, additional material by Dan Fiorella
I posted my version of the sketch a couple of Christmases ago (the link is above) as a "Skit Happens" entry. The broadcast version is below, with the PHC page here. They saved my line for the big ending.
From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things... ![]() Here's one of those bits I had forgotten about. The show's season was winding down and I was pretty much putting every pet peeve of mine into a sketch. It didn't get picked, and I can't argue the point. It's a weird, angry little bit... What are ya, Stupid? |
Dan FiorellaFreelance writer, still hacking away. Archives
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