Category: Skit Happens - Dan Fiorella: Writer @ large

Dan Fiorella

Barely Home Companion: Season Finale! (7/7/01)

7/21/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

It was the season finale so I decided to go all in and do a parody of season finales. Right off the bat, it was a tough sell, GK wasn't much of a TV guy, and that's what I was selling. I have vague recollections of using it for Style Without Substance. Which came first? I don't recall and I didn't make a note of it. It has a Style feel to it, using the whole cast, the silliness, the meta aspect. Obviously, it wasn't PHC enough, 'cause it didn't get picked.

Season Finale! 7/7/01

Barely Home Companion: St. Paul Weight Loss Program (7/7/01)

7/15/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

The 2000-01 season was finishing up and this was my last shot before the summer. I had done weight-loss parodies before and I think the idea just grew around the phrase "cramming food into my pie hole." I don't know what I was thinking. It's kinda rude, there were a number of typos and I should have had the woman say at the end, "Wait, what?" Don't even know if "Wait, what?" was a thing back then. It's one of those (now) comedy clams that people throw in everywhere, but I really like it, because it comes with a sense of befuddlement. Anyways, they didn't take it, so here it is...

St. Paul Weight Loss Program

Barely Home Companion: What are ya, Stupid? (6/2001)

7/9/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Here's one of those bits I had forgotten about. The show's season was winding down and I was pretty much putting every pet peeve of mine into a sketch. It didn't get picked, and I can't argue the point. It's a weird, angry little bit...

What are ya, Stupid?

Barely Home Companion: House of Tea (6/2001)

6/11/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

The second bit I sent the week PHC was in Seattle was naturally going to take on coffee culture. This is actually a reoccurring theme in my body of work, store commercials for owners that are in over their heads. So a guy running a tea shop in Seattle seemed like a perfect bit, I know I've pulled it out and submitted it elsewhere, but it never got picked up. So now it's on my blog! That's something, right? Enjoy!

Dave's House of Tea

Barely Home Companion: The Old Story Teller: Seattle (6/2001)

6/9/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

PHC did its broadcast from Seattle that week, so I tried to come up with a couple of Seattle-themed skits, which is tricky, when my entire knowledge of Seattle was from coffee franchises, and the shows "Frasier" and "Here Come the Brides". First up was a sequel to the Old Story Teller bit I had written earlier that year. Again, it was a collection of facts I gathered online and simple silliness. But, it didn't make the cut. So the present:

The Old Story Teller: Seattle

Barely Home Companion: Land's End R&D (6/2001)

6/2/2020

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell "prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Frankly, I don't remember much about this skit at all! I know Land's End was one of their regular sponsors but for the life of me, I don't remember what prompted me to write a sketch about the sponsors. Weird. Hey it was a long time ago and there was a lot of material churned out. My journals don't say much beyond things I sometimes submitted or was awaiting payment on, leading me to the conclusion that I'm a lousy journal keeper. Anyway, it was a no-go, so, here it is...

R & D

Skit Happens: Pardon My Pandemic

3/31/2020

So, here I am, in lock down, with time enough at last to write some fresh comedy material. But on the other hand, with all the theaters shut down, there's no where to send it to. Oh, well. Good thing there's an internet, right? So, watching the news, it's almost like the whole virus response thing is being run by the Three Stooges or something. And that's what was the inspiration for our next sketch, which is some repurposed Stooge bits with some new jokes. Give it a read and let me know what you think. And if you're producing a comedy show, drop me a line...

Pardon My Pandemic

Skit Happens: Christmas Edition - Christmas Corral

12/20/2019

This sketch may have been rejected in more formats than any other sketch I've written. It's a massive, epic, pop culture undertaking that probably was never going to get off the ground. Even the title came uneasily. I finally settled on "Christmas Corral" because it sounded like "Christmas Carol" and I thought corral sounded like I had to "round-up" a bunch of characters. It was a stage sketch that no group I knew had the resources to perform. It was a radio skit, where I figured having people voice multiple characters might make it viable; however it was too pop-culture (so forget PHC) and too long (forget ACN). Then I pitched it to both Mad and Cracked, thinking it might work as a comic story. Both passed on it. So, it just sat on my hard drive...until now! Enjoy this wacky, silly sketch!

We present this holiday comedy to remind you that my Christmas Comedy Caper, Lost Claus is available over at Amazon. So buy your copy today and avoid the holiday rush!

A Christmas Corral

DOA: Hollywood; Halloween Edition - Amity Mayoral Debate

10/29/2019

TMI: Hollwood produces a live TOPICAL show each week, every Sunday. And by "every" we mean "many." Not everything submitted gets in. And not everything that gets rejected has a shelf life.

Again, I'm really satisfied with this sketch. Back in that summer it had been mentioned to me, as I noted in the forward of the skit, Politics is unpredictable. Like, did you ever notice that the mayor in "Jaws" is still the mayor in "Jaws 2?" How’d that happen?

It was something my son-in-law pointed out to me and it started to flesh itself out into a sketch over time, a perfect Halloween/Election Day combo that seems more common now as horror and politics have gotten more intertwined. Sure, there's a couple of typos and I left the name "Watt" in one place after I changed it to "Carla." So many Jaws Easter eggs in it. And it had some decent bits for the woman in the cast. And some really good throw-away lines and the Abby & Grace characters came out of left field, but really work in this context. Alas, it wasn't produced, but I hope you'll enjoy it now.

1977 Amity Mayoral Debate

Skit Happens: North Korean Edition 2

8/5/2019

Who would possibly write TWO North Korean song parodies? Me! Back in March 2013, things were ever dicey with the Axis of Evil, so North Korea was in the news a lot. Man, pundits were going nuts that we weren't just going in and invading them. I had a joke somewhere about doing it so we could make a sequel to M*A*S*H. Now we go around trying to woo them. How times have changed.

Anyway, here's a ditty I wrote up for the radio producers. It didn't make the cut.

Korea!

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