Also in Hollywood
LY: But Ricky, why can't I be in your movie?
RY: I already 'splained it to you.
LY: Well, 'splain it again. Is it because you're ashamed of me?
RY: Of course not, Lucy. It's because nobody puts TV stars in movies!
LY: Oh, Ricky! Waaaaah!
GK: ...Abbott & Costello even made a movie all about Hollywood.
LC: Hey, Abbott, who's that girl there working on the movie?
BA: Oh, she's the best boy.
LC: How can a girl be a best boy? Does she have to be a best boy?
BA: No. She could be a gofer, too.
LC: Ain't Hollywood amazing!
GK: Carol Channing often visited from Broadway.
CC: Well, Hello, Holly...wood. It's so nice to have you back where you belong...after that earthquake...
GK: And the Godfather did visit.
MB: You could've been director Corleone, producer Corleone, instead of just a writer. Don't worry Michael, I'll make them a 3-picture offer they can't refuse.
GK: And today still, Hollywood attracts the famous and infamous; Gov. Ventura is often here.
JV: Just so you all remember, Schwartznegger is not the first star of the movie "Predator" to be governor. No sir. And it just gets my boa in a knot that I have to keep coming out here again and again to remind people.
GK: Julia Child visits all the time.
JC: Oh, I'm going to show you what to do with all the turkeys you produce out here. First take a turkey, something like "Waterworld" or "Gigli," and marinate it in bourbon until we get good and loaded. And next we'll prepare a delightful stuffing of popcorn and ju-ju beans.
GK: Even George W. Bush...
GW: Hi. Good to see you, Keillor-meister..that's what I call you.
GK: I'm surprised, frankly, to see you here.
GW: Why wouldn't I be? My daddy was a big-time actor who worked in Hollywood for years.
GK: Your father was a life-long politician who lived in Texas.
GW: I was referring to my ideological daddy, Ronald Reagan.
GK: Ah, yes. So you were close to President Reagan?
GW: Schucks, yes. I'd sit on his knee while he told me tales of the evil empire and our godless foes.
GK: Sat on his knee? When he was president weren't you like 35-40 years old?
GW: Yeah, about that. It would depend on the year we're talking about.
GK: I saw in the papers that you hosted Bill Clinton's return to the White House for the unveiling of the official Presidential portrait.
GW: Yes, that was me. Though I'm not a judge of art, I think his portrait was one of those paint-by-number deals.
GK: So, what did you and President Clinton have to say to each other?
GW: Well, he asked me about re-embursing us for all the damage his staff did to the White House before they left.
GK: Oh, right. We kept hearing reports that the Clinton people had trashed the White House before you moved in. Turns out there was no such vandalism.
GW: I don't know how that story got out.
GK: Your aides kept telling it to the press.
GW: I'm sure that was just something that was mis-communiabled to the news.
GK: But there was no damage.
GW: Well, someone did remove the "w" from the doors of all the Women's rooms. That caused a lot of confusion.
GK: Really? All that much?
GW: Yeah. You know they have couches in the women's rooms? And some sort of vending machines.
GK: I'd heard rumors.
GW: Well, I have to get going now. Very busy. I'm off to Grauman's Chinese Theater to see Nemo's foot prints in the cement.
GK: Good-by Mr. President. See, everyone comes to Hollywood.
end