(A LEADER as a GROUP follow him across the stage to the counter. He carries some kind of detecting device.)
LEADER: Okay, we’re now in the cellar of the Benson Mansion where the owners claim they’ve heard the mysterious chain rattling emanating from-
(DUDE in a white sheet pops up from behind counter.)
(Dude pulls off sheet.)
DUDE: Gotcha, dude! I scared you good! Ha!
LEADER: Stop that! Stop doing that! It’s not funny!
ANNOUNCER: It’s “Ghost Punkers.” The show that adds some abnormal to the paranormal.
(A WOMAN leads the group to the door. She holds a device.)
WOMAN: Dave, my sensors are showing a presence here in the attic. Let me just open up this door---
(She does. Dude with sheet pops out.)
WOMAN: (screams) That’s not funny! That’s not funny!
DUDE: Oh, it so is!
ANNOUNCER: Hey, we’ve been following these guys around for years now and they never find anything, really, so let’s have some fun with it, you know?
(Leader is now bringing the group toward the first counter, then leads them away to the opposite counter.)
LEADER: Now back here in the cemetery, legend holds that the ghosts of the murder victims rise up to seek their killer---
(Dude in sheet pops up again.)
LEADER: (screams) You idiot! Stop doing that!
DUDE: Dude, did you just wet yourself?
LEADER: I have a condition! I have a condition! It’s not funny!
ANNOUNCER: Tonight, it’s the premier of “Ghost Punkers” on Syfy. Yeah, it’s not really sci-fi, either.