The gang over at TMI: Hollywood have been doing some video celebrity updates for the 'net and I've gotten some jokes included, so here's a bunch:
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Yes, it’s Election Day and yes, you need to vote. But like much of my life, it’s a duty, a responsibility. I’m not really a passionate guy, even less so about politics. And I remember when my small bit of passion was doused. It’s 1984. I’m 27. I’m watching the First Presidential debate between Ronald Reagan and Walter Mondale, because as a good American, that’s what you do. Mondale, making some point or other about Regan’s policies said “the fish stinks from the head down.” It’s an old expression. I’ve heard it hundreds of times. But apparently Vice President George Bush hadn’t. At the Vice Presidential debate in October of that year, Bush debated Geraldine Ferraro. Responding to a question, Bush brought up the disgrace of Mondale comparing our President to a “dead, rotting fish.” I sat there watching Bush going out of his way to be offended by this old salt. Really? Had Bush not used or heard that common phrase? And Mondale never called Reagan a “dead, rotting fish.” The worse part was the realization that a group of people had come up with that and definitely wanted that worked into the conversation. The moment certainly stayed with me. The whole concept of politics changed. It was one thing to tout your positions, or play up your opponent’s shortcomings but I was witnessing the birth of a new era in politics, the power of outrage. Whether it was purposely misconstruing an Al Gore joke about a union theme being his lullaby (“That song wasn’t written until he was 20! Liar!”) or Republicans getting all worked up about using the expression “putting lipstick on a pig” in the same sentence as Sarah Palin’s name, it was now the way to do things. When it happened to Al Gore, it’s like he never had the thought to counter it with the reply, “It was a joke, you idiots!” At least by the time of the Sarah Palin incident, the Democrats knew how to respond, actually finding a clip of Palin using the exact same phrase. But that bell couldn’t be un-rung. Feigning outrage was the new norm and I was not a fan. I’ll watch the news. I’ll cast my vote but I won’t be leaping for joy when my candidate wins. It’s politics, and a politician will break your heart every time. Yes, another piece, formerly posted on Associated Content. Like other Slush Pile items, I'm updating it for posting here. It sure seems former Vice President Dick Cheney has a lot to say about current events. And the conservatives have been singing his praises for it, which is weird, since truth be told, Cheney pretty much shot the Republican Party in the face and now has them apologizing to him for it (which is how it usually works with Cheney)... Yes, I got caught up in the dumping frenzy. Here's my contribution to the cause: ...The check's in the mail.
Okay, kind readers, time to pull out the plug! As part of our "Christmas in July" celebration, LOST CLAUS, the first of Nick Flebber's off-kilter detective tales, is on coupon special over at Createspace. Type in the code SYFPLQF8 for a $2.00 discount on the cover price (and if you want the ebook as well, that's only 99 cents more at Amazon!). My, it is beginning to look a lot like July! Pick up your copy today! And if you can leave a review, that would be nice, too. Check out the trailer below! Members of the troupe Monty Python announced they will reunite for a new stage show.
Some of the new sketches to expect! The Ministry of Silly Walkers The Olympic Fall and Get up Finals Musical Metamucil Scott of the Antacid Nudge-Nudge, Wake Up, You’re Missing it Ron Octogenarian, First Man to Jump to the Curb The Early Bird Special Restaurant Sketch Crunchy Fogy The Argument Walk-in Clinic The Soft Cheese Shop Self Defense Against Puréed Fruit The Dead Python Sketch Well, with the big guns tucked away until September, or December, or maybe January, what TV shows are the networks planning to fill the air waves with? Let’s check some out:
“Dr. Drew’s Prehab:” Children are taken and sent off to a facility because they show tendencies of possibly becoming addicts of some kind or other. “Let’s Fire Mel:” Reality show where a efficiency expert comes into a business office and puts the office workers though a series of tests before ultimately firing some guy named Mel. “Dating Inferno:” Celebrity chef follows a couple on their first date and curses at them. “Can I Hit You For a Dollar?:” New game show where the host walks up to people and asks if he can hit them with a bat for cash. “Holmes Alone:” When Dr. Watson goes on vacation, Sherlock is forced to solve crimes by himself. “American Cops on Duty, Eh?:” New police show about American cops that they claim wasn’t filmed in Canada because it’s cheaper. “Tanning With the Stars:” New reality show where celebrities tan with the experts. “Jersey, Sure?:” A group of kids try to get a summer house at the beach, but aren’t positive where it is. “Crass Cab:” a person gets into a cab and is offended by non-stop by the cabbie’s uncouth manners. It’s a documentary. The US Supreme Court ruled against fines and sanctions against broadcasters who violated the FCC policy regulating curse words and nudity on broadcast television. Which can only mean one thing…
A hot and sassy new TV season! That’s right, CBS is throwing off its stodgy old programming to get its freak on air! So look for these sizzling new shows! How I Did You Mother! Two and a Half Way! Person of Incest! A Big Bang! CSI: Sweden! Really Big Brother! Mike & Molly & Ted & Alice! The XXX Factor! Hawaii 69! And get to see how those 2 Broke Girls start earning money this year! And yes, it still involves cupcakes! And stay tuned for “60 Minutes.” 60 minutes of what you ask? You’ll just have to tune in. So, watch the hot new shows on CBS and thanks, Supreme Court, for lettin’ CBS get their groove on. Many filmmakers and creative types are using the internet to raise funds for their passion projects. But not all of them may be worth the donation. Here are some of the ones where the crowd-sourcing wasn’t that crowded: Fast-food chain McDonald's announced that it's launching the McDonald's Channel, a digital in-store television network. So, what will the McTV be showing:
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Dan FiorellaFreelance writer, still hacking away. Archives
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