From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
What do you get when you combine a silly specialty store skit with an old joke? You get Smith, Smith & Smith! This is a short, flakey bit that's redundant as all get-out but I was compelled to write it up. I thought I had a decent shot and made it sound as Keillor-esque as possible. PHC passed, as did other radio markets. In fact, one turned it down because he did a quick search and found there were law firms called Smith, Smith & Smith and he didn't want any legal hassles from a bunch of lawyers named Smith, Smith & Smith.
Smith, Smith & Smith
(GK, GS: Geoffrey Smith, PH: Phone Caller)
GK: And now a word from our sponsor, Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at Law.
GS: Hello, I'm Geoffrey Smith of the law firm Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at law. We've been serving the public since 1947, when my father George Smith founded the firm with his brother, Henry Smith. You'll find our lawyers are professional, reliable and named Smith. So if you are in need of legal assistance and you want a lawyer who is professional, reliable and named Smith, then call Smith, Smith, and Smith, Attorneys at law. Our toll-free number is 1-800-Smith, that's 800-S-M-I-T-H-H-H. The extra "h"s are for extra Smiths.
(phone rings)
GS: Hello, Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at law.
PH: (on phone) Hello, may I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: I'm sorry, Mr. Smith is at court today.
PH: Oh, then I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: Mr. Smith is on sabbatical.
PH: Then may I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: Speaking.
GK: Smith, Smith & Smith, Attorneys at law. You may not think you need a lawyer named Smith but you'd be wrong.
END
GK: And now a word from our sponsor, Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at Law.
GS: Hello, I'm Geoffrey Smith of the law firm Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at law. We've been serving the public since 1947, when my father George Smith founded the firm with his brother, Henry Smith. You'll find our lawyers are professional, reliable and named Smith. So if you are in need of legal assistance and you want a lawyer who is professional, reliable and named Smith, then call Smith, Smith, and Smith, Attorneys at law. Our toll-free number is 1-800-Smith, that's 800-S-M-I-T-H-H-H. The extra "h"s are for extra Smiths.
(phone rings)
GS: Hello, Smith, Smith and Smith, Attorneys at law.
PH: (on phone) Hello, may I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: I'm sorry, Mr. Smith is at court today.
PH: Oh, then I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: Mr. Smith is on sabbatical.
PH: Then may I speak to Mr. Smith?
GS: Speaking.
GK: Smith, Smith & Smith, Attorneys at law. You may not think you need a lawyer named Smith but you'd be wrong.
END
