SS: Hello, America. We've seen so much change in the last few months what with a sense of heightened security now tangible in the land. One only need to see the people walking around wearing their ID cards in plastic card holders hung on chains around their neck to see what I mean. America, we can do better. Being extra secure doesn't mean we can't be extra fashionable. That's why I've designed the Cynthia Maxwell line of ID holders.
Like this model here. It's a hand-knitted cashmere pouch hung on a delicate twine made of woven yak hair. Or here I've created a hand-tanned leather pouch strung on a strand of cultured pearls.
GK: Excuse me, Cynthia, but---
GK: I couldn't help but notice that you really can't see the ID cards in those holders.
SS: Okay, you're leading up to something, I can tell.
GK: It's just that the ID holder is supposed to be a convenient way to display the ID card. These are rather...opaque.
SS: Garrison, darling, I can't be a slave to function, it's just not my nature. Wouldn't you rather wear your photo ID in this pleather case, hung on this fine silk twine?
GK: That is very nice. But again, it doesn't properly display the ID card.
SS: I've seen your photo ID. You shouldn't be so quick to flash it about.
GK: That was uncalled for.
SS: So check out the Cynthia Maxwell collection of ID holders and let's help make security fashionable.