
Rent a Mob

GK: Are you frustrated when dealing with the service industry?
SS: (utterly bored) Next.
TK: Yes, I'd like to return this coffee maker, it doesn't work right.
SS: Do you have your receipt?
TK: Well, no, I don't think so. But it's your brand, see the label?
SS: Sorry.
TK: But---
SS: Next.
GK: You need Acme's Rent-a-Mob. It's a large group of colorfully attired villagers, willing to follow you into any situation.
(sounds of angry mob)
TK: Excuse me, this coffee maker is defective.
M1: A new coffee maker! A new coffee maker!
SS: Do you have a receipt?
M2: Receipt? Forget the receipt!
M1: Get the coffee maker! The coffee maker!
TK: I just want to exchange this for a new coffee maker.
M1: A new coffee maker! Get a new coffee maker!
M2: Kill the monster!
M1: No, no, the coffee maker!
M2: Kill the coffee maker!
SS: Yes, sir, right away.
GK: Yes, you'll get results with Acme Rent-a-Mob, available where most mobs are sold. Torches and pitchforks available for an additional fee. Acme Rent-a-Mob, where the mob mentality is a good thing.
end