From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
Forgot about this one. Apparently, the richest girl in the world got married in 2003 and I combined it with My Big, Fat Greek Wedding. Not too much more to it than that. A pop-culture/news sketch was a risky deal with PHC, but I thought the NPR joke at the end might appeal to GK and the gang. It didn't.
My Really Big, Fat Greek Wedding
(GK, AR: Athina Roussel, PP: Poppa, TD: Tod, NK: Nicky, DA: Tod's Dad)
GK: Tonight, after the show, Public radio presents a special radio love story, "My Really Big, Fat Greek Wedding: the Athina Onassis Roussel Story."
AR: But poppa, I'm not sure I want to run the family business.
PP: You're Greek, of course you want to handle the family business. Is that a wart? Let me put some Windex on it.
GK: It's the story of a teenage girl with all the typical problems of being a teenage girl and Greek.
NK: Tod, I think you should meet my cousin, Athina. I think you'll hit it off.
TD: (very WASPy) I don't know, Nicky, what's she like? Is she pretty?
NK: Well, she's got a great personality. And 4 billion dollars.
TD: A great personality? She's fat, right?
NK: No. She's a fun person. And really nice. And she has a kabillion dollars.
TD: Oh, all right.
GK: My Really Big Fat Greek Wedding, a comedy of clashing cultures and tender moments.
TD: Hello, Athina. I brought you a gyro. I hear you people like those.
AR: Yes, we do.
TD: So, where are you from?
AT: I'm from the Skarpios island.
TD: Really? I'm from Rhode Island!
AT: I own Skarpios.
TD: We just rent. So your cousin Nicky said you inherited four billion dollars?
AR: that's not entirely true. I received two billion now, and I get the other two billion when I turn 21.
TD: Why'd they do that?
AR: I guess they didn't want to overwhelm me with a lot of money all at once.
GK: Of course, hi jinx ensue when the families meet.
DA: For their engagement we bought the lovely couple their very own car.
TD: Thank you, father.
PP: We bought the couple their very own country!
AR: Pappa! A country! I told you not to!
PP: It's a very small country. Now, a toast!
DA: Is this ozo?
PP: No, Windex. Drink up, it's good for you.
GK: But the road to happiness is not an easy one.
TD: I can't marry you, Athina.
AR: But why?
TD: It's the money,
AR: The money?
TD: Yes, there's too much of it. You see, I work for public radio, and I'm not use to handling large amounts of money.
AR: Oh, my kukla! I love you so much. We will buy your public radio and take it private and never worry of such things again!
TD: I love you, Athina.
GK: My Really Big Fat Greek Wedding, tonight on most of these Public Radio stations.
end
