Anyway, this sketch was a re-working of some jokes that I had kicking around that I never quite found the right set-up for. Maybe this wasn't it either, but it appealed to my contradian side. Also, I think the idea of parodying those Sunday morning news shows as they devolved into these bizarre attempts at "gotcha" attitudes and odd "what-if" scenarios questions. I think it just never jelled enough for PHC's purposes and they neglected to use it.
Face the Conundrum
WB: Hello, and welcome to Face the Conundrum, I'm your host Wilson Brians. Joining us today is David Highbottom of the Political Insights think tank in Washington, DC. Welcome, sir.
DH: Thanks for having me.
WB: So, David, your group just release a pair of policy papers this week. Could explain these stands?
DH: We've outlined a series of comments against high pharmaceutical prices and the second paper against outscourcing of American jobs!
WB: Now, what if a company told you you could get really inexpensive drugs if they could close their old factory and relocate to Thailand? How would you respond?
DH: Thailand? They could make cheaper drugs there?
WB: Really cheap. I mean, like candy prices.
DH: Well, hm, I mean, lower drug prices would be great, but losing all those jobs.
WB: So you would compel them to stay in there factory while the elderly and sick keel over from lack of drugs?
DH: Well, no, I don't think so. I mean, I don't know...
WB: Also with us today is Helen Nesmith, president of The American Friends of Animals. Welcome, ma'am.
HN: Thank you for having me.
WB: So I understand that members of your group are beginning a high-profile campaign denouncing fur coats once again.
HN: Indeed. Fur is murder.
WB: And we notice you're also on the Board of Directors for a homeless shelter.
HN: Oh, yes, it's a cause very close to my heart.
WB: So, what if we started a program where everyone would donate their fur coats to the poor how would you react to that?
HN: Well, I'm not sure, I mean, the homeless, sure, but, gosh, fur coats---
WB: How about this: There's a new meal program that brings veal dinners to the elderly and shut-ins? Good or bad?
HN: Well, couldn't you give them...
WB: What hamburgers? Fish? Grilled Platypus?
HN: Of course not.
WB: So let the elderly starve?
WB: Let them slaughter those little calves?
HN: I don't know. It's a ridiculous premise!
WB: It's quite the conundrum.
HN: Yes it is.
WB: Thank you. Tune in next time as we examine pro-choice and the death penalty on Face The Conundrum.
GK: That's later tonight on most of these national public radio stations.