I told Christian the only good thing about the rejection was I only wasted my time writing 30 pages instead of 90, then closed my email reply to him with "As for Trading Places, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it."
Minutes later he replied. He was convinced we were at that bridge.
And Consider This, A wider audience knows Trading Places as opposed to Up The Creek anyways, it's a much better, much funnier, and more popular comedy than the other, thoughts on cordially cracking open the Trading Places reboot script tonight? Best.
Hi Dan, r.e. Trading Places Remake, if consensus garnered to review a script, will you flush out to start with a working first act of it for the proceeding? Best. Christian
Hi Dan, are you A-Okay with initiating Trading Places script this evening?, you okay with getting started on it tonight? Best.
I didn't even bother bringing up the ridiculousness of starting "tonight." To which he says:
THE STUDIO EXECUTIVE AND THE COMIC POET, DAN, NEW TITLE , NOW NO ONE HAS TO PAY ANY MONEY TO LICENSE TRADING PLACES TITLE IP RIGHTS, TO MAKE EASIER AND TO MAKE SAFE, DAN, DO YOU WANT TO GO WITH IT NOW AS TITLE OF THE STUDIO EXECUTIVE AND THE COMIC POET? BEST.
Hi Dan, in all considering, my storyline in which I gave you to call as Trading Places for the Remake, is in fact my very own original idea, so, when you mention original idea, Christian The Poet is in fact that, I am just borrowing the Trading Places banner as a way to capitalize my very own story for allowing it as the Trading Places Remake, ah ha, now do u kinda see?, I'd love for you to still hammer it out as a Trading Places Remake, given if the producers give me the wave to read the script. C
Here's the thing about messing around with other people's Intellectual Property (IP)--as with what happened with "Creek--" You write up script pages and if the producers say no, you have a useless script. You can't show it to other people because you do not own the rights to the story. It's a waste of time and energy. And even if you buy the bit about it being Christian's original idea, well, it's still not mine, is it? He's all for throwing enough spaghetti against the wall to see what sticks as long as I'm the one making all the spaghetti.
Well Dan, What do you say you write it as an original then?, use my 4 character names I gave you, base it around them, we don't call it Trading Places, we call it THE STUDIO EXECUTIVE AND THE COMIC POET, then we own the IP and the story, and the rights!, Christian The Poet is myself, and I give you the permission to write my story, and Ryan Mason, and Randy and Morty Wishman of Wishman Talent. Now we hold the rights to the IP if we title it as THE STUDIO EXECUTIVE AND THE COMIC POET, thoughts now on this angle? C
I have plenty of my own spec ideas I can and should be working on. Granted, I was seduced by the idea of getting my work, such as it is, seen by a Hollywood producer but without that carrot I haven't the inclination to work on something that I can't call solely my own. And I've come to realize that I'm not going to impress anyone with a pale imitation of their own work.
There are simply too many gray areas and not enough desire for me to proceed on this.
Hi Dan, let's say that the Producers of Trading Places agree to read your First Act of the Remake, and they like and do approve of the first twenty pages in, then can you say that is moveable and encourageable to task off a 90 page of the Trading Places remake?, kindly message. Best. Christian
This was now becoming pointless. He really thought I was just going to start writing a whole new script on spec. And start that evening. This was bordering on delusional...yet somehow he was in contact with all these people (I'm still assuming he was). But so far they were all one-offs. He wasn't building relationships. If fact, he was tossing away one thing as he lurched toward the next. I never heard back on "Firelight." I said no to "Close Encounters" so that was dead. What was the deal with "Scoundrels?" That was so "hot" and then suddenly wasn't. His connections were there and then not, so each item got pushed back. And you just knew this script would be bumped to the back of the queue any minute while I'm starting to sense the whole thing was leading up to a Christian the Poet movie (what? Starring him?).
Yet, he persisted. He needed pages to show to his contact. I was not about to start writing a script. So, I offered a compromise, I had a Hollywood-related script in my files (The Importance of being Ernie). He could pass that to his contact as a writing sample, along with the outline I had written. So in August of 2016, after 3 months of fits and starts, of emails and phone calls, I laid down the law, sent him my own version of a "Hollywood mix-up movie" and let it go.
I dug out my journal to see what happened, because I don't remember. Two days later, no word. Over the course of a couple of weeks the phrase "No Elias" comes up as I list all the things that hadn't happened (Hey, I'm no one-trick pony, I have lots of things that go nowhere). Flipping head, there was...nothing. No mentions. No response. Afterward, the whole incident just faded from memory until the Rebel Wilson movie came out.
This is my writer's life. Fits and starts, rev-ups and fade-aways. Hustlers and wannabes. Showmen and Straw-men. I wish I had a snappy ending. Maybe someday I will. But today is not that day.
I emailed Christian a link to the bad reviews "The Hustle" received.