All Categories - Dan Fiorella: Writer @ large

Dan Fiorella

Barely Home Companion - The Cheesecake Hut (Oct. '06)

10/3/2025

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

This is one of those sketches I wrote and forgot about. It's certainly in the vibe of my Titmouse sketch or Mel's Dinner sketch. Restaurant sketches are a staple of mine. Whether is a good place to have odd people meet and interact (Blind Date) or just be faced with weird goings-on (TGI-Friday the 13th), it's a great way to hammer out a bunch of jokes and lines quickly and efficiently. I don't know why PHC couldn't see it. I may have to address this to submit to short play festivals or something, it holds up.

The Cheesecake Hut

Barely Home Companion - Blogging Institute (Sep. '06)

9/26/2025

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Man, I thought doing TV parodies was too modern for PHC, I don't know why I would submit a bit about blogging. Blogging was turning into a thing, giving everyone a voice, each those who had nothing to say. It was ridiculous. Telling people you had a blog back then was like telling someone today you have a podcast. And that's why I still blog.

Blogging Institute

Barely Home Companion - Popeye's New Spinach Song (Sep. '06)

9/19/2025

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

Back in the fall of '06, there was an outbreak of E-coli in fresh spinach. So, naturally, I had to rush out and write up a quick song parody to submit to the song that week, as a second submission. That also was rejected.

Popeye's New Spinach Song

Hashtag, You're It! -#Sex An Insect

9/17/2025

Weekly Humorist, a humor magazine I often submit to and occasionally get in, runs these Hashtag Games on Twitter (X), where they name a topic and we submit humorous responses. These games play right into my gag reflex, so I always throw up something. I've taken to setting my calendar to get online every Wednesday to "play" (and by "play" I mean submit content to their website for free--I like to think of it as pun bono work). I always submit a bunch of them on X (Twitter) and some of them get selected for inclusion to their online site.

Feeling like I'm getting in a rut...or rather they are. They keep sliding into the sex stuff. Hey, I can dish out double entendres with the best of them, but at some point it becomes repetitious. I submitted the usual dozen or so and got 5 picked, so I guess I did okay. Now if only they'd pick the article I submitted last week...

Barely Home Companion - I Wanna be a Pirate (Sep. '06)

9/12/2025

From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...

We got to see the big Broadway musical "The Producers" and I really enjoyed it a lot. It was fun and wacky and broke the 4th wall. And the songs were really good, simple with hooks that pulled you in. I didn't get to see it with the original stars, Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick, but what are you gonna do? This one tune hit me. It's the "Want Song," where a character realizes what he wants to get from the story. Here, it's literally called "I Wanna Be a Producer." Also at the time, the big movie for the period was "Pirates of the Caribbean." Naturally, I decided to combine them for this wacky musical parody. And try to turn it into a useable PHC sketch for the start of the 2006-2007 season. It didn't get picked, but it's a cute little ditty, even though I can no longer recall the tune. And now? Pirate musicals are all the rage.

I Wanna be a Pirate

Hashtag, You're It! - # Pot A Pop Star

9/10/2025

Weekly Humorist, a humor magazine I often submit to and occasionally get in, runs these Hashtag Games on Twitter (X), where they name a topic and we submit humorous responses. These games play right into my gag reflex, so I always throw up something. I've taken to setting my calendar to get online every Wednesday to "play" (and by "play" I mean submit content to their website for free--I like to think of it as pun bono work). I always submit a bunch of them on X (Twitter) and some of them get selected for inclusion to their online site.

I dunno, the topics haven't been my favorites lately, and I've been distracted, but somehow I managed to score 11 posts onto the WH leaderboard. I was shaky getting started, but then I suddenly realized the "Pop Star" just doesn't been "todays hitmakers!" So, I pulled out some older names and played around with them and checked out some synonyms for pot and played around with them. That one account who posts but has it set up where you can't comment or even like that post, even that account got a couple up. Frankly, most of that account's contributions are pretty lame, so many that's why I got so many in. Anyway, check out...

Hashtag, You're It! - Catching up...

8/22/2025

Weekly Humorist, a humor magazine I often submit to and occasionally get in, runs these Hashtag Games on Twitter (X), where they name a topic and we submit humorous responses. These games play right into my gag reflex, so I always throw up something. I've taken to setting my calendar to get online every Wednesday to "play" (and by "play" I mean submit content to their website for free--I like to think of it as pun bono work). I always submit a bunch of them on X (Twitter) and some of them get selected for inclusion to their online site.

So, the family was dealing with a lot in the past few weeks and I've been off-line for most of it (except for the usual Twitter-snipes). I missed one week completely, then did not have a chance to be on the blog for longer than that. I did get to participate in the last three weeks, for an hour but this is the first chance I've had to make note of it. I've got the past two games up and awaiting the results of this week's game. Nothing much to explain about these except they are leaning into the scatological more than usual. Maybe those are the ones that connect. There were a couple of weeks it felt like I was the only one participating. And still only got in 6 on the WH website.

#UpchuckSomeChips

Hashtag, You're It! - #Pest Pastries

7/23/2025

Weekly Humorist, a humor magazine I often submit to and occasionally get in, runs these Hashtag Games on Twitter (X), where they name a topic and we submit humorous responses. These games play right into my gag reflex, so I always throw up something. I've taken to setting my calendar to get online every Wednesday to "play" (and by "play" I mean submit content to their website for free--I like to think of it as pun bono work). I always submit a bunch of them on X (Twitter) and some of them get selected for inclusion to their online site.

Okay, weird week. Frankly, this was the fewest "entries" I've seen to one of these hashtag games. It was very light. I did around 10. And WH did the usual weekly "winners," but it was short and mostly their own staff-driven items. It started as combining vermin and baked goods, but ended up where they all do, just making puns about yucky food. Oh, well...

Hashtag, You're It! - #Kill A Cold Drink

7/16/2025

Weekly Humorist, a humor magazine I often submit to and occasionally get in, runs these Hashtag Games on Twitter (X), where they name a topic and we submit humorous responses. These games play right into my gag reflex, so I always throw up something. I've taken to setting my calendar to get online every Wednesday to "play" (and by "play" I mean submit content to their website for free--I like to think of it as pun bono work). I always submit a bunch of them on X (Twitter) and some of them get selected for inclusion to their online site.

After getting scoring goose eggs last week, I tried again. One popped into my head and I decided to go from there. A lot of repetition for the category (hey, they actually included two different people posting the same joke), but I pulled up the search for soft drinks and built out from there. I got 8 in out of 14, so that's pretty darn good. And to think, I do this all for free.

#KillAColdDrink

From the Slushpile: The Slice is Right

7/7/2025

Watching the History Channel and its quirky historical documentary series certainly opens you eyes. You learn so much, like were the Slinky came from, how M&Ms were invented and who made Cheetos famous? Usually the answer is WW II. They did a whole episode on the creation of mass produced bread and how to make it more available to the public and easier to consume. It was all about the race to sell sliced bread.

Seeing it got me top thinking about how they might have approached such an endeavor. I wrote my take on the event several months ago and sent it around. Then it sat on my hard drive until today. Because today, July 7, back in 1928 was the date slice bread was first sold to the world! So let's take a look at the diary of the man who made sliced bread his quest:

The Slice is Right

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