From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
As autumn approaches, my mind goes all Halloweeny. It's a favorite holiday of mine (as many of my posts attest to). No one I know actually likes candy corn. In fact, many people I know actively despise it. Personally, I don't mind it, but it's not chocolate, so that's a big strike against it. But it's part of the season. And like so many other products, I'm sure the candy corn companies are trying to expand their markets.
I borrowed one of PHC's favorite tropes and created the Candy Corn Council that has some plans for that. I've used candy corn puns in my work in Cracked and The Staten Island Advance, so the concept for this bit was always bumping around in my head. Marrying it to a PHC council seemed like a natural thing to do. And I liked trying to make additional uses for candy corn kinda sound practical (British tea time?). Also the fact of the ridiculousness of advertising candy corn as "fat-free" (which I've seen) makes it a perfect target.
I forget how the Christo gag came about, but I think the sketch was built around it, from wherever it developed. I like it. Christo had some of his draping cloth exhibits in the news around this time, but it probably doesn't make as much sense now, but google Christo to understand the fat joke.
I borrowed one of PHC's favorite tropes and created the Candy Corn Council that has some plans for that. I've used candy corn puns in my work in Cracked and The Staten Island Advance, so the concept for this bit was always bumping around in my head. Marrying it to a PHC council seemed like a natural thing to do. And I liked trying to make additional uses for candy corn kinda sound practical (British tea time?). Also the fact of the ridiculousness of advertising candy corn as "fat-free" (which I've seen) makes it a perfect target.
I forget how the Christo gag came about, but I think the sketch was built around it, from wherever it developed. I like it. Christo had some of his draping cloth exhibits in the news around this time, but it probably doesn't make as much sense now, but google Christo to understand the fat joke.
Candy Corn Council
GK: Part of tonight's program is brought to you by the Columbian Candy Corn Council.
ANNOUNCER: Everyone loves candy corn this time of year, but there are lots of other times you may be in the mood for the tasty sugar rush of candy corn. We at the Candy Corn Council are dedicated to extending your love of candy corn all year round! We've put together a booklet with great candy corn recipes like Creamed Candy Corn and Candy Corn Muffins. Mix candy corn with jelly beans and make yourself a coma-inducing succotash. Hmm-Hmm. Mix it in salads, cake batter, your morning coffee or any other hot beverage:
BRIT 1: Would you care for some tea?
BRIT 2: Thank you.
BRIT 1: One kernel or two?
BRIT 2: Two, please.
ANNOUNCER: And candy corn is 100% fat-free!
DAVE: That's right. I'm Dave and I switched to a diet heavy in candy corn instead of greasy fast food and I feel great.
WOMAN: Oh, I see Christo has set up one of his art displays featuring large flapping pieces of clothe in your backyard.
DAVE: What? No, that's just my laundry on the clothes line.
ANNOUNCER: So whether it's candy corn on the cob or candy corn chowder, you'll be eating the sweet life. Candy Corn; it's not just for Halloween anymore.
GK: This message was brought to you by the Columbia Candy Corn Council and the American Dental Society. Four out of five dentists recommend candy corn as the perfect way to pay off the summer villa.
end
ANNOUNCER: Everyone loves candy corn this time of year, but there are lots of other times you may be in the mood for the tasty sugar rush of candy corn. We at the Candy Corn Council are dedicated to extending your love of candy corn all year round! We've put together a booklet with great candy corn recipes like Creamed Candy Corn and Candy Corn Muffins. Mix candy corn with jelly beans and make yourself a coma-inducing succotash. Hmm-Hmm. Mix it in salads, cake batter, your morning coffee or any other hot beverage:
BRIT 1: Would you care for some tea?
BRIT 2: Thank you.
BRIT 1: One kernel or two?
BRIT 2: Two, please.
ANNOUNCER: And candy corn is 100% fat-free!
DAVE: That's right. I'm Dave and I switched to a diet heavy in candy corn instead of greasy fast food and I feel great.
WOMAN: Oh, I see Christo has set up one of his art displays featuring large flapping pieces of clothe in your backyard.
DAVE: What? No, that's just my laundry on the clothes line.
ANNOUNCER: So whether it's candy corn on the cob or candy corn chowder, you'll be eating the sweet life. Candy Corn; it's not just for Halloween anymore.
GK: This message was brought to you by the Columbia Candy Corn Council and the American Dental Society. Four out of five dentists recommend candy corn as the perfect way to pay off the summer villa.
end
