From 1999 to 2004-ish, I was one of the contributing writers for Garrison Keillor's renowned radio show "A Prairie Home Companion." I learned a lot of things there, mostly how to spell 'prairie." It was a solid gig and I'm proud of my work there. But, like any other job, there were...things...
Obviously, December rolled around and I must have felt compelled to do my first Christmas sketch. As I often did with PHC, I circled back to Abbott and Costello. I mean, is it a good idea? Maybe. But that I went right with a "Who's on First" parody about the names of the three ghosts to mimic the names of the three ball players seems weak. But it goes fast and I'm sure it would gets some laughs. I worked it into one of GK's patented "Tonight on most public radio stations" set-ups, and I assumed it stood a chance, but it got passed over, much like the other holiday.
Abbott & Costello Meet Scrooge
Asking AI to generate an image is like asking a drunk toddler to draw a picture from memory. So I had to photoshop it some. ANNOUNCER: Tonight on most public radio stations, it's that memorable Christmas
radio broadcast, "Abbott & Costello Meet Scrooge."
ABBOTT: Scrooge has been really bad, Lou.
COSTELLO: He's a bad boy.
ABBOTT: So tonight we're going to try and get him to change his ways.
COSTELLO: How we going to do it, Abbott?
ABBOTT: We're going to have three ghosts visit him and show him the error of his ways.
COSTELLO: That's a great idea! What three ghosts?
ABBOTT: Who is the first ghost, What is the second ghost and I Don't Know is the Third ghost.
COSTELLO: You know the name of these ghosts?
ABBOTT: Of course!
COSTELLO: Then what's the name of the first ghost?
ABBOTT: Who.
COSTELLO: The first ghost.
ABBOTT: Who. He's going to show Scrooge Christmas past.
COSTELLO: Who is?
ABBOTT: Of course. He's the Ghost of Christmas Past.
COSTELLO: Who is?
ABBOTT: Indeed.
COSTELLO: Look all I want to know is what is the name of the ghost coming when the clock strikes one.
ABBOTT: No, What is the name of the ghost coming when the clock strikes two.
COSTELLO: I don't know!
ABBOTT: He's coming when the clock strikes three.
COSTELLO: Hey, Abbott!
GK: "Abbott & Costello Meet Scrooge," this holiday season they put the mess back into Christmas. Tonight on public radio.
radio broadcast, "Abbott & Costello Meet Scrooge."
ABBOTT: Scrooge has been really bad, Lou.
COSTELLO: He's a bad boy.
ABBOTT: So tonight we're going to try and get him to change his ways.
COSTELLO: How we going to do it, Abbott?
ABBOTT: We're going to have three ghosts visit him and show him the error of his ways.
COSTELLO: That's a great idea! What three ghosts?
ABBOTT: Who is the first ghost, What is the second ghost and I Don't Know is the Third ghost.
COSTELLO: You know the name of these ghosts?
ABBOTT: Of course!
COSTELLO: Then what's the name of the first ghost?
ABBOTT: Who.
COSTELLO: The first ghost.
ABBOTT: Who. He's going to show Scrooge Christmas past.
COSTELLO: Who is?
ABBOTT: Of course. He's the Ghost of Christmas Past.
COSTELLO: Who is?
ABBOTT: Indeed.
COSTELLO: Look all I want to know is what is the name of the ghost coming when the clock strikes one.
ABBOTT: No, What is the name of the ghost coming when the clock strikes two.
COSTELLO: I don't know!
ABBOTT: He's coming when the clock strikes three.
COSTELLO: Hey, Abbott!
GK: "Abbott & Costello Meet Scrooge," this holiday season they put the mess back into Christmas. Tonight on public radio.
