
Unfortunately (for me), they didn't use it. It's not a bad little sketch. And it seems like something I could repurpose for various festivals I'm submitting to nowadays. We'll see. Until such time, we present it here:
50th Anniversary

DEB: It is, it is.
HANK: You really did a great job, Deb. Mom and Dad look so happy.
DEB: They do. Thank you. It’s the perfect 50th anniversary party.
BILL: Yup. Too bad Ben’s not here.
HANK: I can’t believe that guy. How could he not show up for his parents’ 50th anniversary? What kind of heartless jerk is he?
DEB: I’m embarrassed for him and us. People keep asking me where Ben is, “where’s Ben,” “I haven’t seen Ben.” I’m completely disgusted with him.
BILL: And his wife, too. Mary is a shrew. I don’t know how Ben could marry her. Her voice makes scraping Styrofoam sound like nightingales.
HANK: And those kids of his. Unruly brats. It’s terrible how he lets them run wild like that. Going off to far away colleges.
DEB: Yeah, our local colleges aren’t good enough for them.
When did he become such a fancy pants?
BILL: And his youngest is a freak. He gets nose bleeds. From the outside. What’s that about?
DEB: Ben was useless. Whenever I needed some spare change for the parking meter or extra olives for my martini he was nowhere to be found. Good thing we never depended on him for anything.
HANK: I think Ben was adopted. Mom and Dad would never say straight out, but I always got that vibe.
BILL: Really. And when Enron went under, I always suspected Ben had something to do with it.
DEB: He worked for ENRON?
BILL: No. But that’s how he got away with it.
HANK: Typical of him.
DEB: And he showed up at my wedding drunk!
BILL: No, that was me.
DEB: Oh. Right. Sorry.
BILL: No prob. But at least I showed up.
HANK: Not like Ben.
DEB: So what lame excuse did he give you when you called to invite him?
BILL: I didn’t call him. I thought you were calling him.
HANK: Wasn’t it a call chain? I called Deb and she called you.
DEB: I thought you were calling everyone.
HANK: Uh-huh.
(cell phone dials)
BEN: (on phone) Hello?
HANK: Hey, Ben! How are you?
BEN: (on phone) Hey, Hank! I’m good. What’s up?
HANK: You doing anything tonight? A couple of us are getting together for Mom and Dad’s anniversary.
BEN: (on phone) I thought that was next week.
HANK: It’s kind of a surprise, so you better hurry on over.
BEN: (on phone) Oh. Okay, I’m on my way.
(click)
DEB: Oh, wait until Ben and Mary see the party. They’re going to love it.
HANK: It’s a perfect party.
end